Pheremones and Blogginess

I am going to write about something else in just a minute but I need to stop for a moment to talk about pheremones.   Pheremones.  I wikipedia-ed pheremones and that didn't make more than one damn bit of sense to me but I can tell you right now, when I am talking to a what I thought was a purely platonic male friend across a table or who is otherwise a few feet away and I suddenly smell him (not cologne, but HIM, if you're a girl then please fortheove know what I am talking about) you know, like not 'cuz he's dirty or especially smelly, I mean for no reason besides he's talking about something passionately...that's pheremones.  Even with no visible flirting of any kind.  Okay, shut up, I see knees and elbows pointed in telling directions but shut UP.  It's not going to happen.  And really we're only talking about how much he likes history or medical stuff whatever.  Zip.  It.  But I suddenly smell him from enough of a distance that I should not be able to smell people?  Phe-reh-mones.  I smell 'em!  And you smell damn good by the way.  Not acting on that.  Time for you to go.  So good to see you.  kthxbah.  What.  thehell.  doIdowiththat?

Okay, moving on to what I was going to write about earlier which is WAY less interesting.

How do I promote this little blogsperiment to people I don't know in 3D?  You guys (all what?  Nine of you who subscribe?) seem to like it okay and want the writingness to continue.

I don't want to post every post on Facebook.  Those people already think I am crazy enough without peeking over here.  Even Piled High Marketing knows this.

I comment on blogs I read sometimes.  When all the other comments aren't "OMG!" and "HUGS!" and crap like that because I don't want to be anyparta their i's-dotted-with-a-heart-lovefest.  I mean, sorry and all, but jesus...no.  Really, if you ever see me type OMG or HUGS! in a non-sarcastic manner, I have been hacked.

I am somewhat active, a little bit, on MamaPop SparkleMotion.  And those kids are cool about it.  They let me sit at their lunch table sort of but their collective and individual writing and neat twisty-mindedness intimidates me a lot a little.

Not sure how else to promote this without people I already know judging the shit out of me for being a big bag of crazy with a capital Z.

See, I get all bajiggity about whether or not people read this, right?  We've established that 50 million times already?  Fine. Okay.  So here's the part where I cop to being insanely slightly competitive.  There are people out there with over a thousand subscribers as opposed to my nine (or maybe now seven) or whatever (BUT THANKS A MILLION IF YOU DO SUBSCRIBE AND PLEASE DON'T STOP...message me your address, your handcrafted lei will be in the mail any minute.) and that makes me grit my teeth, exhale through my nose, and look out into the world with a determinedly furrowed brow.  How. Do I. Get THAT?!
Which is really scary and sexy at the same time because breathing deeply in this shirt does fabulous things for my cleavage.  Whatever.  Anyway.

I want that.  I want a thousand avid readers who don't know me in real life but think I am kinda funny and smart and maybe wish we could someday have lunch together but know that's never going to happen 'cuz some things should just stay virtual.  And keep quiet, because you kind of scare me half to death.  Except Diane.  I pretty much want a thousand of you, Diane.  And K, Miss Bamboo Spatulas, you know who you are.  I want a thousand of you too.

Basically, how do I get more minions without splashing my drama on everyone I already know?