Monday, August 11, 2008

Kinda Hot

I don't know what my sister was thinking when she invited me out on the boat today. Actually I know exactly what she was thinking, but she hooked me with a bait and switch anyway. She wanted me to be a buffer; in my heart I knew this. I was happily reading Nelson DeMille's "Lion's Game" but she enticed me out by inferring that another boat guest was a likely candidate for dating, even using the words, "kinda hot" in her description…that's when she hamstringed me. I am so weak.

But like I said, somewhere deep down, I knew better. I even asked her on the phone, "Why do I feel like you're marching me off to death here?" She laughed. Ha. The last time my little pirate of a future brother-in-law tried to set me up…let's just say I had a good time anyway. Forty-something with a Harley? That's cool. Is beer going to be there? Sure, why not. Just don't forget to mention that he's also stocky and bald next time.

This time he was a stocky, mustachioed gentleman who was one gun range away from looking like an easily exhausted cop. "Kinda hot?" Sister, we need to redefine our terms here, like immediately.

Kinda hot for me is a late-thirties/early forties former athlete with visible bone-structure and emotional baggage. Throw in a surfer who's smarter than he looks…? Now we're talking. Perhaps I should put this on a sticky-note for her for the future.

That dude over there, chugging Captain and Coke, eager to be divorced in two months after a 17 year marriage smells of desperation and being date-raped in the cabin isn't on my list of things to do today.

I am great at keeping those types at arm's length though (despite my stature, I can be very intimidating…it's a gift), so I was happy to be the buffer she needed regardless. I think the afternoon on the boat went really well actually.

At the Fourth Island I got sun, I met new friends, they caught 113 crabs (we counted), and the little pirate had a manta ray encounter that turned him white as a sheet (we have pictures). When we got back, we cleaned and steamed those little crabbies; we picked them and ate them with a delicious lemon-butter sauce and another sauce of vinegar, onion and Old Bay. Yum.

Today was a good day. And I will finish my Nelson DeMille book tomorrow

No comments: